The Contingency Plan

I had my hair cut yesterday. My aim was to get some amazing do that would transform how bored and frustrated I've been with my looks, but I walked away with something similar to what I walked in with. Just a lot less of it.

Anyhow, after a restless day today, Hugo's just fallen asleep and I'm reflecting on the conversations I had while I was at the hairdresser - yes you can tell the cut wasn't inspiring as this is the after-thought. I'd normally say something to the hairdresser, but the experience was smothered with so many high expectations that I thought I'd cry if I did. And falling into the stereotype of the emotional wreck of a mother who feels/looks like shit around all those pretty people would've have helped.

But back to the story, one of the conversations was with the apprentice who washed my hair and the other with the stylist who cut it. The apprentice, Jenny, was really young, pretty and very much a party animal and Jon, is recently married and lives nearby with his wife.

It may be disasterously obvious, but I realised my life has entered its next phase. Although I enjoyed both conversations, I was more comfortable with Jon's chatter. I guess part of me always thought I was a still a bit of a party girl, especially as I was 6-7 months ago, but then I thought I'm in an established group of friends and we have dinner parties, picnics and BBQs far more than we party. In fact, most are in a committed relationship. A couple of have their own business or kids, most have a mortgage and nearly all of us are working seriously hard to get somewhere with a career.

Damn this looks so boring in words, but it's not. We laugh a lot. We still go out and have known each other for years so there's a binding joy, comfort and history in each other's company.

Anyway, I'm happy with my life but have noticed I've developed some not-so-good habits. Like serious procrastination (especially with housework) and emotional eating. I lie in bed at night getting down on myself for not cleaning and make plans to get my shit together tomorrow and do that most night. Wolfie's stuff is a different case though. That has to be spotless.

My body has also dramatically changed and it's disheartening. I find myself hoing Oreos and ice cream to numb the reality of it. Chloe called me today and I thankfully heard she's also wearing the same clothes everyday, that her stomach has also lost its structure and firmness and that she doesn't even step near her old clothes. My boss put on 10kgs in the six months after she gave birth from midnight lamingtons and milk. I could easily do this but don't want to. But it's Christmas and I think it would be foolish to employ a stricter eating habit around the festive season.

Damn. I have to do my Christmas shopping tomorrow. Yep, I did it again. I have a list of what we're buying everyone, but I've waited until Chistmas Eve to do it all. Unbelievable. Nothing better than a Christmas shopping rumble! Lucas and I have a plan though - he's going to drop me off at the mall after I give Wolfie his mid-morning feed. My aim is then to buy everything in the three hours I have until his next feed. This saves trying to find a park and if I don't get the shopping done (which would be surprising as I have 'the list'), I'll give the baby another feed while covered up in the car, drop the goods off for Lucas to offload and continue shopping.

Sounds good to me...