The Contingency Plan

I was thinking today about the men I've dated and others I've quietly pined for.

I don't think I have a type as there have been dancers, models, tech/gaming nerds and even a philosophical goth (university days, what can I say). I was desperately in love with a half Polish, half Italian man during my first year of university. I remember him being a beautiful and quite perfect with an accent to boot (oh how they kill me!), but I can't remember what he looks like anymore only how he made me feel. Like myself he was studying Communications, but a third year student with a girlfriend of three years. He also painted on the side, which only romanticised him further in my mind, something I could've done without at the time.

A good friend Sarah and her girlfriend Cam even consider my relationship with Sophie to be an intense lesbian relationship without the sex, but they were down a partner for swing lessons that week so who knows.

My mother believes a woman is attracted to different men in different phases of her life. I used to grow weak at the sight of a skinny rocker type and even weaker if they were a red head but that certainly doesn't happen as often. I guess young, fun loving, irresponsible partying types don't attract me much anymore.

I know there are exceptions to Mum's belief, I think she was really telling me not to commit to anyone before my tastes had developed a little.

Tangent: could this, coupled with my father’s consistent cheating be why I’m scared of marriage?