The Contingency Plan

After extensively searching your main real estate internet portals, I would like to suggest the following:

• 'Brand new' and 'three years old' do not mean the same thing
• Posting a picture of the property’s back yard (and not of the actual house or its interiors) will not entice me to lease it, especially if it will cost me extra to maintain the yard
  
• 'Quiet surroundings' really means the bush or the boonies
• What does ‘Executive Style’ mean? Will I want to hold business meetings in this townhouse? Will the interior design look like my office?
  
• An internal intercom system is not the same as a solid alarm system, it just means I can see the robbers before they bust through my door
  
• Listing properties that have been leased long ago will not make me think you have an extensive client list, it will make me think you’re lazy
• Please don’t list an open house time and add it's subject to change without notice, just ask me to contact your office for an inspection
  
• Gas and electricity should never be listed as 'extra features'
  

*Deep breath*

I've had my say...

Don't you just LOVE marketing ploys?!

True... I actually don't mind a clever marketing ploy, but unfortunately think these people are just daft and unimaginative.