The Contingency Plan

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As a parent with shared custody, I often fight the desire to keep Wolf always entertained. Playgroup, play dates, playgrounds, the zoo, toy shops, books. It's as if every moment has to be special and engaging and yesterday I rebelled.

While preparing lunch, I was reminded of my own childhood and the games that resulted from boredom... I spent hours picking leaves and flowers from neighbourhood gardens to sell (often back to those whose flowers I had "borrowed"). Branches that fell from our beautiful Jacaranda tree became mini microphones. Old pieces of cardboard boxes transformed into chalkboards for when I taught my poor (younger) brother at "school".

It wasn't mum's job to keep life interesting, it was her job to keep us fed, healthy, protected and warm. We had to come up with the rest.

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Thinking about all of this lead me to examine my own life and how much I shun boredom, especially when I'm alone. We all seem to do it in some form or another; we're all so busy (isn't this the usual response to the question of, "how are you?" these days?). And even if this is genuinely the case, should we be scheduling in time for nothing? Is it really that absurd? Are we that addicted to feeling busy and virtually connected?

And then on the flip side, we all seem so 'bored' with aspects of life. I'm bored with television, with the music on the radio, with household chores; others are bored with their job or the monotany of daily routines. We're consistently seeking new inspiration and greater distractions.

I was discussing these ideas with a friend recently and was intrigued by his response:

"I don't think it's a matter of needing to be busy but a sense that I need to be productive, almost like I'm timesheeting my personal life. When I went to Paris last year, I got the impression they don't focus as much on productivity as a means to accumulating things. Their coffee shops are always full, even in the middle of the morning. Sure, they're probably behind certain countries industrially, but no wonder they're known for romance and creativity - they actually have the time to breed it!"

So I started thinking back to my childhood in relation to my friend's comments and wondered whether boredom and inactivity actually fosters creativity. It kinda makes sense to me as your mind would have the freedom to roam and explore ideas, free of activity and obligations. When I'm not doing anything I have the time to examine my life and new possibilities.

And, here's really a thought, would I consider things in more depth if I responded differently to my boredom? For instance, instead of distracting my boredom with more activity or expecting others to inspire me, should I pay attention to it, sit still, do some research and think a little harder (God forbid!)?

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I'm not one to suggest an answer to things, this is more an exploration of ideas, but am I challenged to be ok with doing nothing. And to feel comfortable with turning off my phone on the weekends, with the social exposure I'll feel when I just walk down the street (sans phone calls and iPod) and then there's the challenge of accepting loneliness and boredom as positive things in my life that will hopefully inspire creativity and other good things.

Hm...

Any thoughts or are you all too busy??

i often long for boredom, and then when it strikes I panic for distractions.

usually those distractions come in worry-forms (finances, job-stress, etc.), so boredom doesn't work for me--even if i do like your ideas here.

That's the cry of most American kids, with their electronic games, gadgets, and rooms full of toys - "but, Mom, I'm BORED!". I think kids need a certain amount of unstructured time so they can look within themselves and nurture creativity and assess what they need to do to entertain themselves without parents dragging them from one thing to another. Hurricanes in FL are a great opportunity to work with boredom. When the power goes out, suddenly you really need to think to keep yourself busy or entertain yourself since you can't click on the TV or computer. A good reminder for us to get back to basics.

I try to appreciate boredom as a sign that I need to try something new, or that I am fortunate enough that I needn't rush from job to job to make ends meet as some must do. I also try to appreciate it because it means there are no problems at the moment as we've experienced in the past.
Junebee

So SM, do you have any still and quiet moments or are they all filled? Please tell me they're not. Glad you like the ideas... :)

And Junebee, how are you? I've missed hearing about your life and Branch and Blossom... please feel free to write VERY long updates here :))

xx